But the problem comes when you stop seeing yourself as someone who is good (or great!) and trying to become even greater, and start seeing yourself as someone who cannot write a single good word on a page. When you hate everything you write, because nothing comes out exactly as you’d pictured it in your head. When you rewrite your ms seven times and revise it thirty-two more times and there’s still that one pivotal sentence that just will. not. sound. right no matter what you do because you are such a terrible writer and…
This is when you need to take a step back and cut yourself some slack. We spend so much time trying to improve that sometimes we forget we are improving. We become our own worst critics, and never feel like we’re getting it right. It’s good to want to improve yourself, but not if it’s going to take you over and make you miserable.
I find that it sometimes helps to look back at things I wrote years ago—or even more recently—and see how much I’ve grown. It puts things in perspective, and reminds me of how far I’ve come. Because you should never become so overwhelmed by your desire to perfect your craft that writing stops bringing any enjoyment. Life is stressful enough without creating more of it for yourself. And if you’re never having any fun, what’s the point?
*Since this is a blog by writers, I specified my focus, but the advice applies more broadly, too.
Great post. I guess we writers just like to torture ourselves... :)
ReplyDeleteGreat post! I blogged about the exact same thing today!
ReplyDeleteJessica
After a tough writing morning, it was nice to stop by this post and get a bit of encouragement :)
ReplyDeleteI agree completely. What a timely post. Thanks, Kaitlin. :)
ReplyDelete"We spend so much time trying to improve that sometimes we forget we are improving." So true. Love the last paragraph especially. Awesome post, Kaits!
ReplyDeleteKaitlin-- thanks for the post. it was exactly what I needed to hear today.
ReplyDeleteYou know, I think it goes in a cycle. When a writer starts out, they are gung-ho... until they realize how hard it REALLY is. Then confidence dips for awhile as rejection after rejection comes through. After some time and consistency, we rightfully get back up to the point where we should be; confident but not too much so. At least this is how it worked with me. Great post.
ReplyDeleteThanks, I needed this! I'm so critical of myself! Nice to chill out sometimes.
ReplyDeletegreat post! i so needed to read that...
ReplyDeleteYes, yes and yes. It is unbelievably easy to get so swept up in perfectionism that we forget why we're writing in the first place.
ReplyDeleteThis is exactly what I needed to read this week :-)
For soem reason, I read "Ease up on the self-pleasure, " and totally thought I was on the wrong blog.
ReplyDeleteI did a writers conf this weekend and one of the presenters said she only has one rule for her writers group. You never present your work with an apology.
I definitely put more pressure on myself than everyone else combined!
ReplyDeleteAwesome post, Kaitlin!
ReplyDeleteI haven't opened my first book in about a year. I probably should, just to see how I've grown, but it's like at this point I'm putting it off and putting it off because...I don't know why. I'm afraid to see how much it sucked? And I'm wondering if, a year from now, I'll look at what I'm writing today and feel the same way?
ACK!!! Self-pressure indeed. :P